Move it out

Written by Amie on June 29, 2009 – 1:26 am -

woman_box

Clearing the clutter!

A few weeks ago, I spent many hours de-cluttering the house, getting ready for a garage sale. I had no idea how freeing it would feel to get rid of “stuff”. I have read and heard about how de-cluttering isn’t just about getting rid of  material items. Material items correlate to your inner world.  I had been feeling claustrophobic for awhile, knowing that the stuff all around me was mirroring all of the “stuff” going on inside me. After the garage sale, I took the remaining unsold items and donated them. I knew there was no way I was bringing them back into the house!  Then, this weekend, I re-organized and got rid of even more stuff. I was on a roll! It felt so good to clear out stuff that is no longer useful to me and my family.

Correlation

While I was working on clearing the stuff, I was really able to see the correlation between holding onto physical stuff and holding onto emotional stuff. I suspected it before, but now I actually felt aware of the truth and what was happening inside me. I was finally ready to let go of some old beliefs that were no longer serving me. I was attached to the beliefs, just as I was attached to the stuff that I hadn’t looked at in years. I kept putting off the task because I felt too overwhelmed and too scared to think of tackling my “basement full of stuff”. Now I can see that my “basement” was referring to the physical basement in my house, and at the same time, the basement of stored beliefs in my body.

Another step to awareness

It really amazes me when I am able to see the connection. I feel like I have taken another step on my path to awareness. Years ago, I never would have seen this correlation. It is such a gift to be able to see what is happening in my inner world, and how that is connected to my outer world. I felt that a whole part of me that was buried under stuff was finally able to peek out again. I felt such relief, and such joy knowing that I was allowing a part of my true self to be seen again.  Now I am working on why I was burying those parts of me. Why did I choose to park them in the basement and leave them for so long? Maybe I don’t need to know why, but maybe I do. We’ll see what comes up. I just know that there is no need to feel afraid of it. It is just another layer of “stuff” that needs to be peeled away. Another layer of me that can be free.

Free!

Feeling free to be me feels really good! I have made a conscious choice to follow my heart. I know what is right for me, and I choose to listen. Will it always be easy? No, but it sure will feel good to know that I am honoring what is really true for me. This got shoved into a box in the basement somewhere, but now it has been released! It is very exciting! My hope for my kids has always been that they follow what makes them feel alive, so I am giving the same gift to myself. It feels really good not to have that extra baggage! I keep looking at all of the empty boxes that I now have, and I dream about the possibilities. I am free!!

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Let me be myself

Written by Amie on June 25, 2009 – 1:39 am -

campfire3-mLike-minded people

I am realizing more and more how important it is to have people in my life that  love me for exactly who I am. It is also very important to me to have people in my life that are like-minded. My family and I went to an unschooling conference this past week, and it became even more clear to me that in order for me to feel whole, I need to be around people that share the same values that I do. The main value being acceptance-accepting people for exactly who they are, and where they are on their journey. It felt so incredible to be around people that are respectful to their kids, respectful to themselves, and who accept me for who I am and where I am on my journey. It felt so good not to have to hide who I  am. I knew that it was okay to be who I am, and that I wouldn’t be judged.

Let Me Be Myself So I Can Shine (a song that fits right in here!)

At the conference, I became even more aware of how much I alter my personality in front of some people. I think we all do to some extent. I know who it is safe to be vulnerable around, and who it isn’t. I know that I don’t disclose everything about our unschooling life because some people really don’t want to understand it. That is okay with me. However, I decided not to hide who I really am any longer. I came to the conclusion (finally!) that if someone doesn’t like who I really am, then they really aren’t a true friend anyway. I felt a sort of freedom after that “ah-ha” moment struck. I looked around at all of the beautiful children at the conference and decided that I want what they have-and that is to be honored and loved for exactly who I am.

Be Who We Were Born To Be

We are perfect exactly as we are. Yes, we have some healing to do in order to get back to that truth, but it is okay to be who we were meant to be!  I am setting the intention for myself right now that I will not hide parts of myself so that someone else doesn’t have to go out of their comfort zone. If I am not expressing my true self, then true happiness is not possible. In order for me to heal and grow, an to be present with my loved ones, I must be exactly who I was meant to be. Not always an easy task, but one that is worth the effort.

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Posted in Connection, Healing & personal growth, Self-love, Unschooling | No Comments »
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