Hello feelings, it’s me again

Written by Amie on June 9, 2009 – 1:49 am -

Split personality?

So, the first time I did this, I thought it was like having a split personality. Maybe it is, who knows? The important thing is, it helps alleviate stress, anxiety, and depression. I know that when I started on the road to recovering from depression, I didn’t think I knew what I was feeling. It was easier to say “I don’t know”,  when asked what I was feeling.  One thing that does help, I have found, , is really allowing my feelings to talk to me. If I am feeling anxious, I try to ask the anxiety what is going on, what is it that I need? Most of the time, I write about it because it is easier, and I don’t get caught up in my head so much. I write down the feeling, and then I write everything that comes up after I ask the feeling what it is that I need to know. It is amazing what comes up. It is a step towards healing. Sometimes, depression can be alleviated right then, but many times, it takes many of these sessions to get relief. Each time I do this, I feel stronger emotionally.

Afraid of despair and depression

Our society is so afraid of depression, most people will do anything to avoid having to deal with it. Drug it, distract it, deny it, suffer without asking for help or, continuing to do the same thing getting the same result. Which leads to the feeling of hopeless and helpless, two of the main reasons why suicide rates have increased.  I think if we can first be aware of what is going on in our body, we can then find out what those feelings are trying to tell us. We can embrace our feelings, and be grateful for them. They are trying to tell us something. Depression is a chance for us to grow. So many doctors and so many people in general just want to make it go away. But, if we are able to embrace it, and invite it to speak, it will lessen it’s grip on us. I keep coming back to “what we resist persists”. Many of us want these negative feelings to just go away because if we invite them to have a voice, we may discover something about ourselves that will need some action on our part. Maybe we are depressed and we think we don’t know why. If we allow the depression to talk, it may tell us that something in our life needs changed. Maybe it is a job, maybe it is a relationship, maybe it is having to deal with something from our past that is still triggering us. It could be many different things.

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Go ahead, talk to your feelings

We are all energy beings, so if we keep repressing emotions (which are energy as well), we will have stuck energy in our bodies. It really does need to move, it has to come out somewhere. If we keep denying our truth, the energy that is stuck can make us ill. I believe there are many reasons for depression, but the main one being that we are suppressing our true self, the truth of who we are. Our truth is being strangled inside us. No wonder so many people feel depressed in this world right now!  So, I am encouraging everyone to talk to themselves!  Be with yourself in awareness, and see what you are feeling. Then, talk to your feelings, see what they are all about, without judging them right or wrong. Write it all down. If you are worried about someone reading it, then write it all down, explore what you wrote, and then burn it. That’s a good ritual anyway, it can symbolize “letting go” of something. Of course, you can also ask your worried feeling to talk to you to see what is really going on underneath the worried feeling!

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Posted in Depression, Healing & personal growth, Kids/teenagers and depression | 3 Comments »

3 Comments to “Hello feelings, it’s me again”

  1. Ian Says:

    Hi Amie. I read somewhere that your body is your subconscious mind (Molecules of Emotion by Candace Pert).

    My interpretation of this is that your feelings/emotions are the communication channel that your body uses to bring what it knows to your attention. And since your body is always there with you, I think it is going to have a far better idea of what has gone on in your life than your own conscious mind! I would even say that the body is far wiser than the wisest human too.

    What all this means is that when you are having an unpleasant feeling, you should respect what your body is trying to tell you and take some action. Sure, we would prefer not to feel bad, but the body just tells it like it is (it deals in truth), regardless of what effect it will have on us. So, in the case of depression, the body is telling you that you need to make some pretty big changes, as opposed to trying to just cope.

    So I would say that indulging your feelings might sometimes be counter-productive because you can start to identify when them and act sad when you are feeling sad and act scared when you are feeling scared, etc. Instead, once the message has been received, the positive steps to feel better are more important, so you can act in accordance with how you want to feel rather than how you do feel. I personally think you have got the balance right – you are still listening to your body’s status updates, but your actions are incredibly positive and you are making great progress towards how you and your body would like to feel.

  2. admin Says:

    Hi Ian,
    I agree with everything you said. I wanted to offer a suggestion to those who aren’t quite to the step of being able to even identify what their feelings are.I remember when I was in a place of feeling horrible, but I couldn’t really figure out why. So, I had to learn to talk to the feeling of not knowing, or the frustrated feeling. Once we know what the feelings actually are, then we are able to acknowledge them and take action. Since so many people have learned to repress feelings, many aren’t even aware of having feelings.

  3. jakho19 Says:

    Ian and all,

    I too agree with what you’re saying about listening to the body. It is imperative to arrive at the heart of what is perturbing us at that moment or phase. I also like what you are saying as well about even feeling through frustration of not understanding what we are feeling.

    Non-identification is critical to introspection into our feelings and fears. This fundamental precept is preached throughout Buddhism and has been keenly adopted into Western psychology by some leading psycho/spiritual therapists such as Dr. Tara Brach and Dr. John Welwood.

    I do admit some difficulty in being able to achieve non-identification. I had been aware for months of my sense of lack of self-worth and deeply held belief that something was wrong with me. I told myself, as teachings suggested, that we are inherently untainted; compassionate, loving, and unscathable. I didn’t adequately ‘feel’ it’s words. I didn’t take the time, or was not able to shake the feeling that something was deeply wrong with me. In the end, I allowed my self-dislike to reign again during a trying time and I lost a precious relationship.

    Non-identification is critical. But it’s not enough to say it. We have to search, scour, and FEEL it in our body. Feel it until it becomes cellular. Let your heart open to the feeling of being loved and understanding that the source is always available to us. I didn’t know how urgent we must act. Self- dislike is a powerfully destructive force if we don’t first recognize it, and act to counteract it. Hey, we’re all lovable just for the simple fact that we’re alive and love truly is our deepest self. Just look and you will see that, more importantly feel it.

    Anyone who is having trouble seeing that, talk to a friend, family member or therapist quite soon. It can snowball out of control quickly. Also, so you know, I love you. I mean it. And I’m not the only one.

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