On the journey to self-love

Written by Amie on September 27, 2009 – 4:09 pm -

Begin the journey to self love

I want to share with you a process that was very helpful to me. It is a process that will hopefully help you on your journey to self love.  When I did this process for the first time, I felt weird doing it because I was not used to taking the time to discover things that  I love about myself.  I had picked up the message that I shouldn’t give myself compliments, somehow doing this was selfish. I soon realized that being selfish can be a good thing. My description of selfish is more along the lines of taking the time to discover who you are and what you love about yourself. It was more about giving myself nurturing because that is what I needed at the time.  It can be a reminder that self love is very important to our well being. This process also reminded me that I have access to love at all times. Inside each of us, there is a limitless amount of love.

Things I love about myself

I made a list of things that I love about myself, and things that I want to learn to love about myself. The first time I did this, the list was short. It was not an easy process for me the first time. I also made a list of attributes that other people have told me they love about me. This was not easy either, because I tend to be the person who doesn’t always believe the nice things people say to me. I have done a lot of healing work around the idea of receiving as well, but that is a whole other process to talk about!  After writing everything down, I merged the three lists together onto one main list. I rewrote each attribute so that they read, “I love……and I finish each attribute. I made sure to write the sentences in the present tense, as if they are already true. For example, “I love myself because I am sensitive to other people’s feelings,” instead of writing, “I want to love myself because I am sensitive to other’s feelings”. I read them over to myself once silently. Then, I read them out loud to myself. Yes, this feels funny at first, but I did actually start enjoying it! I liked hearing my own voice saying nice things to myself. I write everything as if it is already true, since it is already true, we just need to be reminded of what we have forgotten.

Beautiful video that pairs Louise Hay affirmations with a song by Barbara Streisand

The nice voice starts making it to the surface

There were many times that I repeated these messages to myself several times a day. There were also times when my negative voice jumped in to doubt the process. I learned to tell it to just shut up. It took awhile, but I soon started giving myself a pat on the back every once in awhile. I would do something that felt really good, and instead of the voice beating me up, I started hearing a small voice that sounded pretty nice! It was amazing. It felt really good! The negative voice tried to drown out the nice one, but after a lot of practice (A LOT!) that little voice got stronger and louder. The more I worked on it, the more the little nice voice starting getting to the surface before the negative one. Most of the time now, the nice voice wins out. I’m not saying the negative voice never creeps in, because it definitely does, but it is getting less and less.

Make a promise

At the beginning of my journey, I needed to do processes like this one quite often. I made a promise to myself that I would keep working at it until I felt self love in my body. It is an on-going process, but I still do exercises like this every so often. It does help that I aware of the negative voices that like to sabotage the whole process. It is a battle for awhile, but I kept the promise to myself that I would keep at it until the voices learned to just take a back seat. I wanted to share this process with you because it has been a really important part of my journey to self love. It has been a journey! The steps are not always clear, and I do still have bad days, but they are much less and also less severe. We are all capable of loving ourselves and feeling joy. This is just one way to re-discover the love that has been there all along.

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