Nothing is “good” and nothing is “bad”

Written by Amie on June 30, 2013 – 2:55 am -

I wonder what lesson this is bringing me?

Nothing is “good” and nothing is “bad”. Situations and experiences are just that, they just “are”. They don’t have to be good or bad, right or wrong. Everything that happens in my life is for the purpose of my spiritual growth. By labeling my experiences, I distract myself from feeling them authentically. We have been conditioned to label everything that happens to us. It is what we do as humans. I am learning to step back and observe my experiences, trying not to label them. This is hard work. Not an easy practice. My mind wants to label everything, wants to put each experience into an organized file so to speak. But what if you don’t call something good or bad, right or wrong? What if you can step back and say “hmmm….here I am experiencing this, I wonder what lesson this is bringing me?” Everything is for our growth, it is up to us as to whether or not we choose to “see” the lesson. If I think about the labels of right and wrong, they conjure a feeling of shame. I believe these words are used to invoke a feeling of guilt and shame in people. Who gets to decide what is deemed “right” and what is deemed “wrong”. Obviously I am not speaking of murder or things like that. That is another issue. But seriously, right and wrong…interesting topic. Where did this list of right and wrong come from? And why is it needed when it comes to an individual’s life, if everything happens for the purpose of our personal growth? I even think about people who say things like, ” he was wrong to do that to me”. What if it turns out to be the best thing for the person’s growth? It is easier to blame someone else and make them “the bad guy”. It is easier to become the victim than it is to really look at why certain things are happening in your life. And also, really looking at your reactions to them.

I wanted to label it “horrible”

Recently, I caught myself labeling my experience of being cut out of someone’s life. I wanted to label it “horrible”, and “a terrible thing”, and I also labeled it  “a relief”. While I was busy labeling, my heart was hurting. Even though I told myself I wasn’t surprised that this happened, I was grieving deeply for the relationship I never had. The relationship I have dreamed of. So, I allowed myself to just feel the pain. It is difficult to explain my experience without also labeling it. So I will just say, my body was heavy, tired, and my stomach felt sick; I believe this to be grief. The longer I allowed myself to grieve, the more my experience became about my body sensations and an inner *knowing*, rather than a story. The process was pretty cool. As I just allowed my emotions to flow through me, the pain lessened. I started feeling lighter. Sadness is still lingering, as well as some fear. But, overall, I feel better and I have come to the understanding that all is well even though this experience appears to be “horrible” if I were to label it. I know that it is all happening for the growth of my soul. I know it was “meant to be”.  I go in waves of being okay with it and being deeply sad.

I am exactly where I am supposed to be

I always come back to a *knowing* that things are exactly as they should be and I am exactly where I am supposed to be on this journey. I know that if I can just allow my emotions to be as they are without judging them or labeling them, they will flow through. This doesn’t mean there won’t be pain, but as long as there is truth and allowing and accepting, the wave will flow smoother.It really helps me to keep a neutral outlook. Life isn’t simple, but it can be easier if we can just let it flow without calling experiences good or bad, right or wrong. Sometimes things happen that appear to be terrible, and they may not be easy to feel, but at some point it will be clear as to why they happened the way they did. If we can stay in truth instead of trying to hide in denial, the message or lesson will be revealed.

This is one of my new favorite songs…I hope you enjoy it. You are loved!! “I Am Light” by India.Arie.

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2 Comments to “Nothing is “good” and nothing is “bad””

  1. elaine Says:

    I have been reading your blog for a long time and have been helped, soothed and found deeper understanding from your words and been inspired by your journey. This entry comes at a critical moment in my life and I want you know that I just keep reading it over and over and each time I feel a little better, a bit more able to hang on. Thank you so much for sharing, may you be blessed. With love, elaine

  2. admin Says:

    Elaine,
    Thank you so much for your kind words. I love knowing that reading here has helped you. I’m sending you strength, courage, and love during this critical moment in your life. Know that I am with you. Much love to you, Amie.

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