My new best friend

Written by Amie on August 17, 2009 – 11:47 pm -

My body is good to me

I am not really sure what changed, or what happened, but I decided to become best friends with my body again. I have been mad at it for quite some time, and I was being pretty mean to it on a regular basis. I would say mean things to it, and tell it how disappointed I am with it. Then, it’s like a miracle happened, and I woke up one morning with compassion for my body again. I suddenly realized that this body of mine has been pretty darn impressive, in addition to being really good to me. It carried twins for me, and it nourished 3 of us exclusively for over 2 years. It continued to nourish 3 of us for almost 5 years. I am now in awe of my body. I realize that it has helped me stay healthy for 44 years now. It doesn’t look exactly how I would like it to, but it is exactly how it is supposed to be right now.

I trust my body

I am trusting my body, and I am asking it on a regular basis now, what it needs. And, the best thing is, I am actually listening to it! It amazes me what my body is capable of. When we tune in to our body signals, our body will tell us exactly what it needs. We can choose to listen, or choose to ignore it. The cool thing is, our bodies give us so many chances to start over. Maybe next time we will listen, or maybe not. It is very patient most of the time. It is not a fair weathered friend. It hangs in there with us for the long haul. Some people abuse their body over and over, and still, it is there for them, waiting. At any given moment, it will allow us to try again.

What do you want  to eat?

Today I asked my body what it would like to eat. It really does give me an answer. It also tells me to go take the dog for a walk, time to move. It is incredible how many times I just ignored it! My brain was trying to override my body. Sometimes this will happen. In fact, it happens quite often when we are stressed out, depressed, or just feeling out of sorts. I have cussed at this body, like it is a person trying to make me do something! I would become angry at my body for trying to help me do something that is good for me.

It is Natural to Feel Good

I am ready to listen to my body now, and it feels so good! My on-going practice has been to have compassion for others, but that didn’t include my own body. Now my practice includes my own body too! I look at it with love and compassion. If I even start to think something mean about it, I correct myself, and I apologize to my body. I tell it thank you many times a day now. I talk to it, and tell it that I am going to listen to it, and that I trust it completely. Saying that I trust my body feels very powerful and makes me feel very connected to myself. I really feel as though this practice is helping me to love myself more and more. It feels like I have a new friend that loves me for who I am. I want to return that love. It is amazing the relief I feel since the tug-of-war ended. I am hoping it will stay this way. I completely trust my body to be exactly what it needs to be.

My body knows what I need at any given point

I trust that it knows what to do because it knows what I need it to be at any given time. The more I trust, the more I believe that our bodies are capable of so much more than we give them credit for. I can tell a huge difference in how my body looks to me when I am feeling love for it. When I am feeling grateful and loving towards my body, I look in the mirror and I love the way I look. When I was feeling very frustrated and disappointed in my body, I would look in the mirror and hate my body. So, I guess this is one more layer to add to my practice. It feels really good to have love for my body instead of hatred. I feel incredibly blessed to be living in this body. It feels like I am walking around with that dreamy lovestruck look in my eyes, and it feels really really good!

Byron Katie

Here is a video by Byron Katie called “I hate my body”. If you aren’t familiar with her work, you might want to check this out. She is amazing!

I would love to hear from you!

I always forget to add a note encouraging all of you out there to please comment! If you have a story that you would like to share, please do. I would love for this to be a place that you all feel safe to write about your own experiences and feelings. I do have the forum set up as well, if you would like to start a new thread on there. Sharing experiences is a wonderful way to connect and help each other.

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I am not my body

Written by Amie on November 19, 2008 – 1:58 am -

I have been struggling a bit with this idea for quite awhile now. For most of my life I thought that my body is who I am. I would judge myself by the way I looked. When  I worked out (obsessively), and was in “great shape”, I judged myself as being “good”. Then I had my twins, and working out fell to the wayside for awhile. I would go for walks with them, and chase and play with them, but in my judgmental fog, I never felt like it was enough. So, fast forward 11 years, and boy am I harsh on myself! I really do feel like I am pretty conscious most of the time, so it is hard to realize that I am judging myself for my body shape. I want to be able to look in the mirror, and tell myself that I love me. Better yet, I wish there were no mirrors anywhere! Wouldn’t it be nice to just BE ourselves without having to check out what our bodies look like in the mirror? Then, I think I could stop judging myself so harshly. Maybe. I want to be able to feel who I am, to feel the essence of me that lives in my body. Most of the time I am connected to this. There is just that other part that still wants to hang on to the judgement.

I also think of the people that I love to hang out with. I never view THEM as their bodies. I am able to see right past that, and really love them for exactly who they are, which is not their body. Intellectually, I do know that I am not my body, but it is hard, especially in this culture, to be non-judgmental about our bodies. I want to love and honor my body, since it serves me so well. I want to be grateful everyday for my body and for what it enables me to do.

My theme song right now is by Mary J. Blige called Just Fine. It gives me inspiration to be nicer to myself. I also listen to the song I Will Be Gentle With Myself by Libana. Sometimes I listen to it over and over, trying to saturate my cells with this thought. One day it will really feel a part of me-that I love myself unconditionally. I can’t wait until that day.

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